Simple Reasons Why Walking is More Than Fitness

Simple Reasons Why Walking is More Than Fitness

“Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” -Kahlil Gibran

Last weekend was quite disastrous. Oddly, I started to feel a cold developing right after plans fell through the cracks. It was nearly lunchtime, so my family and I opted to eat at Wendy’s while discussing how to make the most of the rest of the day. We could’ve have eaten this meal in our own town, but we made the trek to Elyria, Ohio. We were advised on places to check for my children’s missing father, to no avail. So, there we were, eating “comfort” food- burgers, fries, chicken, and pop. I ate a salad for good measure- it went well with the spicy chicken snack wrap.

I feel like we cheated ourselves on choosing to eat fast-food. It seemed like a satisfying choice after running around all morning and driving for an hour. My mind probably sent off a dysfunctional signal to be rewarded by carbs and convenience. Now that I am being reflective, I am starting to see unhealthy patterns in our lives.

Unhealthy patterns weren’t the only ways in which my family coped with distress that day. I suggested that we visit the old park where my kids played as very young children. It had been over 10 years since those early days of spinning around on the merry-go-round and the tire swing. In more recent years, we spent time at the park, scaling the rocks and blazing the trails.

Last week, when we visited Elyria, we were excited to see the renovations to Cascade Park. Although the park has now been landscaped differently- seemingly, with fewer trees and no access to the bridge, I  found it to be more appealing to people that like to walk. Prior to renovations, the focal points of the park were the central playground, followed by the two smaller playgrounds. Over the years, we watched in despair as many of the pieces of equipment were left in states of disrepair. Kids no longer could take a ride on the bouncy car. There were a few enclosures filled with tables for families or couples to pause and enjoy the rolling green fields, or vast, lush trees.

The most important thing about last week was the time spent with family. In that time, we walked the newly-paved sidewalks and revisited the familiar rocks and caverns. For various reasons, walking was a breath of fresh air. Walking is therapeutic and it’s more than fitness.

Healthy Distraction

We burned off our pent-up anxiety by walking. My mouth was a mile a minute, partly because I was angry, partly because I was rapid-cycling. We didn’t spend much time talking about the disappointment of the day. Instead, we talked about silly things. I also wish to say, there are a time and place where it becomes necessary to dig deeper into emotions, lest one might become prone to depression or resentment. I experienced depression following last weekend, but the depression was more intense than usual, on account of being sick.

Simple Reasons Why Walking is More Than Fitness

Dialog- With Self and Others

Ever since I was a kid, walking around with friends has always been an easy (and free) way of socializing. It seems as though my kids aren’t always willing to go for a walk with me, though they might be more inclined to walk with their friends, nevertheless, when I coax them to walk with me, we usually have good discussions. Sometimes, we generate ideas by brainstorming with one another while walking.

Simple Reasons Why Walking is More Than Fitness

Change of Scenery

Being around new scenes enables me to crawl out of the rut I’ve been wallowing. I think for this reason is why I’m able to generate ideas while walking. Of course, being with family or just moving in general, are also contributing factors.

While walking at the park, we saw many new faces and observed some subtle nuances in the environment. Perhaps my mind was working behind the scenes- trying to decode the changes and nuances, while my higher level dealt with the anger and disappointment in the preceding circumstances.

The visual beauty of walking is obvious. In Ohio, trees are abundant on many of the trails. One is almost always lucky enough to stumble upon a river or creek at many of the parks and trails.

A change in scenery and a breath of fresh air are a feast to both the mind and body. We can nurture ourselves by sharing a good walk with others- or, even just ourselves.

Simple Reasons Why Walking is More Than Fitness

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5 Simple Joys on a Saturday

5 Simple Joys on a Saturday

“Many people lose the small joys in the hope for the big happiness.” 
― Pearl S. Buck

Finding things to do in a small town is often challenging. However, we live next to a larger town, which has abundant shopping centers, restaurants, and a movie theater. It also has a couple of thrift and consignment stores to help freshen the wardrobe or buy a few $3 DVDs. It’s even more challenging to buy food in a small town, as the only grocery store in town lacks variety and is very expensive. With a little hindsight, I try to plans my trips to avoid anxiety and overspending.

To assuage my anxiety, I shopped, as planned, in the early morning hours today. Like a pro, I dashed effortlessly through the aisles, never once becoming stymied over an unstocked necessity. I checked off all the items on my list and stayed under budget. The best part was having to only carry 3 bags into the house!

While unloading groceries, my cat greeted me and snuck under my feet to sit on the porch. She looked so happy at just sitting there. I paused to look and listen to my environment, as to capture some of the simple joy of existing. Often, we chase unattainable and superfluous things to achieve happiness. Humans have a gift of complex minds, unlike animals, but they might have us outwitted when it comes to being happy in the moment.

5 Simple Joys on a Saturday

After I tried to capture my cat being “one with nature”, I figured I’d do a few simple things outside. These simple things brought a little light into my life.

Creatures

The cat seemed so determined to get outside- I listened for a moment to the sounds of spring. It almost sounded like a rainforest outside, with all the birds chirping and other creature sounds. Suddenly, there was a woosh sound and the birds all flocked away from the beast below (my cat).

While driving to the towpath, I noticed hens and ducks, fenced in makeshift, backyard barns. Along the trail where my family and I walked, I could hear cows mooing up ahead. We turned just as one of their cowbells rang. There was also one peaceful pony, standing around in the small plot of land.

Many of the farms were vast, however, I did see a few smaller animal sanctuaries next to a children’s swing sets and toys.

Farmer’s Market

When I rolled into town to grocery shop,  I glanced over a parking lot full of cars to see the main attraction. Just a farmer’s market. Then I thought about my new diet that includes more fruits and vegetables. I hadn’t planned on stopping there, and since I was unable to quickly assess an easy parking spot, I drove past. There were swarms of older people, grey-haired grannies bedazzled with sunhats, while their husbands dawdled along in loafers and polo shirts. I felt out of place and intimidated. Also, I didn’t have cash on me and most of the vendors only accept cash.

The sight of such a grass-roots movement of people buying locally-grown veggies appealed to my desire to be healthier. The mere sight and thought of the farmer’s market kind of inspired me. Sadly, I only implemented my newfound attitude by slicing up oranges for my family’s lunch. I did go out in the yard and weed a little bit though.

Water

The sound of the water rushing over the rocks was very calming. I leaned my phone over the babbling brook to snap a photo of the simple scene. My thoughts drifted off to the time I bought a “Sounds of Nature” CD from Goodwill a few years ago. I remembered how the sounds of the storm and rain drowned out the Friday-night noises coming from next door.

5 Simple Joys on a Saturday

Convenience Stores

In between that long stretch of time from lunch to dinner, we venture to the corner gas station or convenience store. Since pre-packaged, snack-sized goodies are a pricey luxury, my family view such seldom excursions as “treats.” Little nuggets of indulgence and generosity to ourselves. The kids opt for the Icee and I grab a Frappe.

Plants, Trees and Other Scenery

The community works hard to maintain the towpath for both pedestrians and cyclists. The grass is neatly-trimmed, with a few plants scattered among various park benches and picnic tables. Vast, open and welcoming, I’ve never been so pleased to just be outside and breathing air.

I suppose that living with anxiety and depression and so many other negative elements has made me appreciate the good times. Hopefully, I can better learn to make good times out of more of my days.

5 Simple Joys on a Saturday

10 Reasons Why I Love the Simplicity of Weekends

10 Reasons Why I Love The Simplicity of Weekends

“Elegance is achieved when all that is superfluous has been discarded and the human being discovers simplicity and concentration: the simpler and more sober the posture, the more beautiful it will be.” -Paulo Coelho

During another arduous day at work, I was surrounded by a glimmer of hope. That hope came in the form of gazing out the open dock doors, which circulated a faintly sweet smell of fresh, spring air. Yes, that same air that plagues me with overwhelming allergies, also ushered in my delightful mood. I suppose the fact that it was Friday may have contributed much more than I give credit.

This morning, I wanted to “treat” myself to a day of not having to cook or clean dishes, so I pre-ordered a pizza. I like to think of buying fast-food as a legitimate cheat I can offer myself in times of crisis- kind of like “phone a friend” from “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?” fame.

I often pontificate about the joy of the weekends. In a flash, the weekend whizzes by, yet anticipating the weekend are what often makes people happy.

What is it about my weekends that makes me so happy?

I Get To Decompress

Decompression to me is the gentle art of releasing the stressors that have been building. By releasing these pressure points regularly, I am better equipped to handle additional challenges. My mind has been fully recharged, so I now have sufficient resources to effectively deal with daily challenges, as well as having more resilience in the event of unexpected stress-inducing situations. The way I decompress may be different from the way you decompress, but the theory can be applied to anybody.

Doing Things On My Terms

Although I don’t have many complex projects abounding, I still find joy in doing the most mundane things on my own timeline. For instance, I get panic attacks when I go shopping at Walmart on Saturday afternoons, so I plan ahead to pick up my groceries. I feel kind of special when I can just pull up and have people load my groceries and wish me a great day. This is a far contrast to what I’d experience going inside to shop- crowded aisles, confused and rude shoppers, misplaced items, and long lines. I like that I can go shopping in the early morning hours, while everyone is still at home. It’s a tranquil scene to have an entire store devoid of the flurry of activity that often induces overwhelming anxiety.

Time To Shop More Consciously

When I shop early in the morning or arrange to pick up my groceries, not only do I avoid anxiety, but my mind can focus on making better food choices that are within my budget, instead of mindless shopping. Mindless shopping leaves my wallet empty and my conscious guilty because I have given in to fear and anxiety, instead of using my mind as a tool to provide resources for my family. To be governed by fear is at the heart of many poor choices.

Time To Organize and Declutter

When I bring in stuff, I have to be mindful of what I clear out of my pantry and my house. Again, the principle of mindfulness, as opposed to mindlessness, is one of simplicity. You can see it in the way somebody keeps their house- is this person concerned and mindful of their resources, or do they just view possessions as unimportant. Do they covet their possessions? I am enthralled by how some people are so mindful of their lives- especially, closely-knit groups of people, with strong cultural or religious beliefs.

More Quality Time and Quiet Time with Family

To wake up before my kids and get started a little ahead of them has always been something I’ve indulged in since they were very young. I was able to do this by going to sleep at a reasonable time. I let them sleep in a couple of hours after I wake up. Not everyone can do this, I understand. Some people are not morning people. In that case, there may be other ways to carve out a little time to get ahead of the day.

Sometimes we go to the movies on Saturday afternoons, when the price and crowds are minimal. Less energy is expended worrying about contending with crowded seating and noisy patrons. When it’s quiet and less-crowded, those simple moments with your family aren’t lost on other distracting elements.

Scenic Drives in Town and Country

Early-morning driving into town lends itself to some very peaceful moments for me. Sometimes I see a beautiful scene and I feel inclined to take a picture, but, of course, I don’t stop. There are moments to be shared, and there are moments meant for only you to enjoy. These times might impress something inspiration upon my mind.

Hiking, Being Outside In Nature

In Ohio, there are many scenic walking trails. My favorite park is about 5 miles away and it is home to equestrian trails, canoeing, fishing, and, in the summer, swimming. There is a small pond that is inhabited by the loudest bullfrogs. Just when I think I will be fast enough to spot one, it disappears into the water or beyond.

Reading Lots of Non-Fiction Books

When I pick out books at the library, I grab several because I know some of the books aren’t worth a read. However, I usually pick “winners” when I choose. These books are penned by PhDs, M.D.’s, and best-selling authors and speakers. Usually, my tastes lean towards psychology books, religion, and spirituality, emotional well-being, etc. Much of the information contained in the books is entertaining because the content is presented from a different and unique perspective.

10 Reasons Why I Love The Simplicity of Weekends
A pile of non-fiction books carefully selected at the local library.

Intellectual Stimulation

During the week, I only have time to read news-bites. When I stumble upon important issues, I further research and study them online. If I’m really interested, I find some videos on the subject matter. The weekends are a time in which I can expand my horizons by taking free online courses. Some are interesting enough that I take the time to complete each assignment. (Remember that thing about bipolar? Sometimes it impairs my concentration, so I have to be very selective about what I am willing to commit).

Candles, Aesthetic Design, and Discovering Interesting Blogs

Candles are such a simple way to indulge the senses and create a home filled with warmth. Yes, I’m trying to intellectualize my affinity for Vanilla-scented candles. After I’ve decluttered the pantry, I open up the mail from each day and discard the junk mail, tack-up the important bills and notices, or file in another suitable location.

When the house is organized and decluttered, and the aroma of vanilla-candle is wafting throughout the house, I feel inspired to cast a few glances at the lifestyle blogs at Bloglovin’. My own blog has recently been verified and I’m discovering some other wellness and mental health blogs. While Bloglovin’ is largely known for its Pinterest-like aesthetic filled with beauty blogs, it is very much fertile ground for the unique types of blogs that are featured on WordPress.com. 

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How Should I Feel About My Depression?

How Should I Feel About My Depression

For about a week straight, I experienced depression. A number of things contributed to the manifestation of my depressed state. I will talk about the contributing factors before moving on to ruminating over my feelings and thoughts about depression.

Change in Seasons and The “Good” Life

For me, spring and summer don’t bring feelings of exhilaration. Why? They are both beautiful seasons. When I was a kid, I loved the freedom of summertime, playing with friends, walking around doing nothing. As an adult, I am the person responsible for everybody’s happiness. I must orchestrate car rides (with none other than myself), worry about safety issues, hand over money, feed everybody- stuff most women think about regularly. But, I have the side of me that wants to be the best provider for the family, keep up on the yard work, arrange car repairs, and home repairs. This is stuff both men and women must tend to in their lives. The problem is the I am not fluently either of those stereotypical roles, yet I feel compelled to excel at both roles, or I am plagued by guilt and envy.

I am embarrassed to say that I am often envious of my neighbors. The strange thing is, I am jealous that the dad has so much time and energy to spend playing with his son outside. I often don’t feel like even going outside, let alone playing outside! And I have considered that the neighbors are a couple, who are about 10 years younger than I and have only one child to chase.

The dad works to make home improvements every summer, while I keep putting off repairs (I am trying to pay off my current debt). I did paint the front steps last year and paid $500 for a household issue recently. It’s wrong to be envious of my neighbor’s lives. I don’t personally acquaint myself with them, and I have no right to make assumptions. Furthermore, I’m certain they have their own struggles, even if they differ from mine. When you observe others superficially, it’s easy to see only the surface issues. I want to give my family more, but I can’t overextend myself. I believe I have accepted my limitations, but I haven’t accepted all the limitations to my budget, my time and other resources. As soon as I learn to accept all these components, maybe I will turn away from envying what others have.

The Logistics of Family Well-Being

In the summer, I worry about my kids at home. My daughter attends a daytime summer camp for teens a few days each week. She seems to enjoy it, but I often worry about if she is eating right and getting along with others. As for my son, he is getting older and will have a job this summer. At least I hope he gets a job in town so he doesn’t have to come work with me in the humidity and harshness of the manufacturing industry.

We don’t have the means to go on vacations, and with the pressures of social media and peers, my kids feel somewhat unusual in comparison to other kids.

Expectations of Others

My ex-husband lacks respect and remorse when he lets down my kids. In our marriage, I often felt mismatched, not only emotionally, but intellectually, with him. In many ways, he had the mentality and maturity of an adolescent boy. In dealing with his kids, he exudes this same immaturity- for example, my daughter inquired about his sudden absence this past weekend. She poured out her heart, only to receive a simple, “k” in a text message.

I feel I’ve let my son down because he always makes snarky comments about my work shirts. It is as though he is ashamed that I have a blue-collar job. Instead of seeing things how I see them- as a strong woman who continues to battle depression and anxiety while taking on the responsibilities of life (keeping a home, paying bills, providing food and clothes for all), he believes his dad had the most potential, but assuredly failed the hardest. My ex’s family probably white-washed many ideas about their son towards my children. They often proclaim their genetics are responsible for anything resembling an achievement in regards to their children/grandchildren. I tell my kids their achievements are a result of their own hard work!

Illness.

With springtime comes a flurry of allergens, which can wreak havoc on those like me, who are allergic to pollen. Eventually, my immunity weakens, and I get very ill. In the past weak, I may have had the stomach flu because I had the chill and wanted to sleep a lot. It’s been 6 days and the mucus is breaking up, and my mood is starting to improve as well.

I’ve particularly vulnerable to depression when I’m ill. When I am sick, I don’t feel as independent as when I’m healthy. Instead of being the planner, preparer, and provider, I become the cast-off. I got weepy at times when I think of what elderly people must feel when nobody checks in on them. What am I worth if I’ve placed all my value based on my abilities to do for others? What if I am unable to do such things? I haven’t considered who I will be apart for those humanly constructs.

Sometimes I wonder if depression is something to be “cured”. When I say this, what I really mean to say is, shouldn’t I give proper attention to my emotions, past trauma, and grief? Depression isn’t easily understood, not by Ph.D.’s, or lay people. As a chronic sufferer of depression, I choose to actively and healthily engage with the entanglements of mind, body, and spirit, when I seek to understand causes and I look for solutions.

  • Life and its inhabitants are dynamic and complex.
  • The purpose of life isn’t about one’s comfort, though I’ve falsely believed in “happiness” mantras.
  • Consider depression a sign of depth. Some would have you simple repress your capacity for depth by diminishing your feelings. In many instances, doctors and therapists, are the only people equipped to understand a broader scope towards mental health issues. However, there are many lay people who don’t have Ph.D.’s but may have much wisdom about depression and other issues.

Depression is something in which I can’t medicate. I don’t respond well to several of the various classes of antidepressants. For this reason, I’ve been lead on a quest to understand depression- not necessarily to treat depression.

Life Hacks for Staying Productive During Depression

Life Hacks For Staying Productive During Depression

“I found that with depression, one of the most important things you could realize is that you’re not alone.” –Dwayne Johnson

Can you recall a time in your life when you were so crippled by depression that you weren’t able to focus on anything but your mental health? There was a time when I was so depressed and unable to do even the simplest of tasks. Sadly, this occurred right after the birth of my children, who are two years apart in age. It seemed as though everything was working against me. Some things I can distinctly remember are:

When Your Family Isn’t Equipped To Help

My mother, stepfather, and sister, lived an hour away from me. They were all pretty absorbed in their own problems. I remember feeling like a wallflower, an invisible entity when I was in their presence. My sister was a single mother at the time. She’d have my stepdad and my mom babysit for her while she pulled side jobs. She had many financial difficulties and often borrowed money from the family. They bickered about the money she owed them and complained about having to babysit so much.

I felt guilty for asking for help with money, but I did seek their advice when I was dealing with my abusive husband. They always told me to get away from him, but nothing more than hollow words to appease their own conscience. It took me years before I attained the wisdom to leave my husband.

I especially desired emotional support. I was too far away from the family members that were able to help us. The church and a domestic violence support group offered me the social support and knowledge I needed to take care of my kids on my own.

I Lacked Self-Worth

After my pregnancies, it was hard for me to lose weight. Here I was, in my early 30’s, mentally and emotionally exhausted from depression and anxiety. The constant chipping away of my soul continued for 4 years. My ex-husband took great delight in berating me when I weighed 160 lbs. He told me my stomach stuck out more than my chest, and he could get anybody he wanted, but nobody would want me ever!

I Lacked Mobility

When you are poor, it’s hard to keep up a car. There’s the car payment, the insurance, the car repairs, and of course, e-check. In Ohio, if you have an older car, you can forget about passing the e-check. In fact, I had to get a waiver because I paid money to correct the deficiencies, but it still failed. Luckily, the county I currently live in doesn’t require e-check! But the car I lease now would pass the emissions test.

When you have young kids, many people run the other way when they see you’re in need. After trying to unsuccessfully find a place to stay, I wanted to see if the kids and I could be part of the transitional housing for the homeless. There were several churches that participated in this project. The only catch was you had to move your family each week to another church “host”. I didn’t think that was a great idea for my family, given the fact we had been through so much already. Eventually, we were approved for an income-based apartment. Many people endearingly refer to these homes as the “projects.” It was the best option for us at the time, despite the fact that there was a lot of shady activities going on in the complex.

How did I ever manage to be productive when all this was going on in my life? Nothing fell into place quickly, unfortunately. It took years, but those difficult years helped me become disciplined, even when I was depressed.

Some things that worked to my benefit during my most difficult times?

Ask For A Flexible Schedule

My employer (NACS) was aware of my situation, to some extent, and allowed me to come into work after my son got on the bus in the morning, and after I took my daughter to the childcare center.

Have A Routine At Home

My kids and I followed a regular routine of when we ate dinner, played, and slept. Going to sleep on time, at the same time each day, helps your body maintain a regular rhythm.

Enjoy Low-Key Activities

When you feel the surge of anxiety or depression, it’s hard to be around large groups of people (especially, confident and happy people). While it’s not good to isolate yourself from people, many times they unwittingly cause more hurt than good. We used to go to the park when very few people were there. I took my kids to the “Book Mobile” to get videos, books, and puppets. The Book Mobile is essentially the local library contained on a bus that comes to your establishment (nursing homes, the “projects”, etc.).

Some other “low-key” ideas to get you out of the house, without throwing you into chaos when you are least likely to enjoy it, would include:

  • Walking around a quiet lake
  • Going to the movies during matinee
  • Stopping for some ice-cream
  • Fishing, boating, camping
  • Visiting a nature center

Write Lists

My ex-husband used to scoff at the fact that I was so mentally burned-out that I needed to write everything down. If I didn’t write down even the most minute task, my brain was too foggy to recall key information. Amid depression, domestic violence, unexpected “guests” showing up to “party” with my ex, and the weekly visits from the police, my mind wasn’t focused on the future. Instead, I was stuck in mere survival mode.

My family could not have moved beyond those ashes of despair, that bleak kind of existence, if it wasn’t for writing down to-do lists, tasks, resources, and even Bible verses on index cards.

Get Up And Dressed

It’s important to give your appearance some hope the better days that lie ahead. When you take a shower and get dressed, it’s easier to be ready for whatever is going on in the day. There may be an expected opportunity waiting for you- an unexpected job offer, an unexpected friend may call and want to have lunch. Taking the time to get ready is refreshing to your body and your well-being!

Discovering Hope in the Midst of Depression

For years, my weight teetered around 150 lbs. I had a two-year “resonance” in 2012 when I got down to 135. My restricted diet at that time consisted of yogurt and no snacks in between meal. A few weeks ago, I installed the MyPlate app. Sometimes I logged my calories, sometimes I felt unmotivated and didn’t log my food. I figured I was eating right, even though I was hungry. To quell the hunger, I drank some high-calorie drinks.

In my mind, those delicious, high-calories drinks didn’t count as “real food”. When I felt those familiar carb-cravings, I succumbed to the urge to reward my brain– and in the process, deprived myself of health for simple hunger “fix.” Each day, I drank soda or an iced coffee. Sometimes chocolate milk.

Instead of choosing healthier food that would help my body work more efficiently, I opted to still have fast food. Then I weighed myself last week and discovered I gained 5 pounds, instead of losing any weight. For a 5’3 woman, my weight was too much. According to Rush University Medical Center, the ideal weight maximum for my height is about 143 pounds. I would love to be at 135, but I could accept 145.

Sometimes, I don’t even care that I am overweight. I say I don’t care because I have confidence that I can conquer the battle of the bulge. I know I can’t lose it overnight. It’s a slow process. When I see little progress, I decide I must not be doing something right, so I might as well have a Starbucks Vanilla Frappuccino. Or, the family is eating Pizza Hut, might as well “break bread” and have a slice with them.

When I see myself in the mirror, I don’t see an overweight person. It can’t really be me in that mirror! That woman is not really fat, just a little frumpy.

I Have Issues With My Heart

Thump, thump, thump….ever since the doctor asked me if I experienced any heart fluttering, I listen for it more when I am laying down, or when I am at work. I can’t really say much else until I get the Holter device next week.

Anxiety And Panic Attacks

The diagnosis of the “extra” heartbeats (ectopic heartbeats, PVC’s), I’m wondering if I could have something else wrong. I feel as though just thinking about it today at work was making me nauseous and dizzy. In the mirror, I removed my glasses to re-apply fresh eyeliner. My face was as pale as a ghost. Or was it in my head?

Depression

Usually, by now, I’m riding the wave of mania.

No energy, only lots of yawning (despite sleeping 8 hours).

No creativity, no desire, no hope.

I’ve been thinking about how pointless hobbies and writing are to the grand scheme of everything. There is really nothing new, nothing in the world that hasn’t been said, written, painted, or sung about previously. What is life when you take away all the pleasures and activities we stuff into our lives?

Still, I smile at jokes. I enjoy my friends at work. I love my family. There is a lot of brokenness in my family. More significant people in this world have a strong network of caring people. My mother disowned me 10 years ago. There is a brokenness in the relationship, but for me, it is also brokenness about the idea of “motherhood.” Mother’s Day is rapidly approaching.

Last year, I had to leave a church service on Mother’s Day because I couldn’t stop crying. Everybody was watching me too since the pastor called attention to all the single moms in the room. The pain and loss of my own (living) mother affect how I see myself sometimes (for instance, a failure at being a daughter, a failure at not meeting my own expectations of “mother”). Even people that have been rejected or worse, abused, by a mother, still experience a loss when that person is no longer of a part of their lives.

Neverending Worries

Why does it seem as though people like me, people suffering from anxiety or depression, can’t ever take it easy, or enjoy life? Everybody else seems comfortable, quite content and happy in the things of this world.

Here I am in this world. Just like anybody else that you see. A little bit imperfect, no visible clues about the pain inside. Hiding the pain, denying pain, like many people in the world.

Words of Hope

Proverbs 3:5-6 ESV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

Matthew 11:28 ESV

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

John 16:33 ESV

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world, you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

A Simple Lesson on Nurturing Ourselves

Lessons On Nurturing

I believe many people regard taking care of themselves as a frivolity, or an act of selfishness. Unhealthy demonstrations, disguised as “self-care” are, indeed, selfish and even destructive. Unhinged shopping sprees may give me a temporary lift, but it isn’t the soulful lift I need to manage myself and others. However, taking the time to replace the drawer of missing and tattered socks isn’t selfish. Not all acts of shopping for myself are selfish.

Bad Lessons

  • The quality of love and care that one gives is circumstantial and conditional.
  • Nutrition is unimportant- grab some junk food and soda.
  • If somebody is behaving badly, keep out of their way or behave badly in return (watch for signals).

Not Trained To Think of Myself As Important

As children, my sister and I never got new clothes or even used clothes very often. Sometimes we got a bag of clothes from an aunt or grandparent. I’m quite sure I never considered the bag of bell-bottom corduroys as a gift or a curse. I got through my high school years wearing jeans and t-shirts- black t-shirts, concert t-shirts, one-size-fits-all shirts. I was happy wearing those clothes and it was very low-maintenance. I still do not treat myself by way of buying clothes, although I am very much in need of the most essential of clothing, jeans, and t-shirts. I long for some dressy clothes sometimes but never make the effort to buy myself such things.

Diet & Nutrition- Taking Care of The Physical Body

Those who lack a strong support system especially need to manage self-care in a balanced fashion. We should not turn to mere substitutes or addictions, no matter how benign they may appear. I am guilty of using caffeine as a crutch. This is probably a factor in my erratic moods and weak food choices (carbs, lots of carbs). A steady stream of caffeine and a depletion of vital, cleansing water leads to an abundance of empty calories and garbage in the body. Perhaps my mood swings are the only way my body can adapt to balancing all the garbage I eat and all the mindless clutter I am consumed by each day? This is something I will explore further.

Leisure Time

Let’s face it- men have their “man-caves”, and some ladies like to get manicures. And then we have the rest of the world. These are ordinary people taking care of their families, working a job, attending school, etc. They may lack the means- time, energy or money- to enjoy “leisure” activities. It is essential to carve out even a little bit of time for yourself each day, whether you have to stay up after the kids go to bed, or get up earlier to go for a walk, read, or whatever else feeds your soul.

Being busy in life sometimes makes us lose ourselves, which can cause us to feel bitter, devoid and empty. Often, it is not until a crisis or conflict when it becomes apparent that self-care is as important as the care we provide for others.

Unpacking the Baggage of the Past

Issues from “the past”, people from our past and messages from the past continue to plague us subconsciously. Both solitude and good company can help us “recharge” and make sense of the world around us. I have suffered frequent episodes of depression in my life, which has made me more isolated at the very times I needed support. I was taught it was embarrassing and “weak” to cry or have emotional needs. As a child, others were told to “not baby me” when I needed to talk or receive encouragement (not criticism). My achievements were not validated by my mother, I wasn’t “validated”. Today, I still battle with such feelings of inadequacies.

My first job as a production artist proved challenging for many reasons- my depressed moods, adjustment to medications, and the stressful work environment (my supervisor didn’t like me, our boss came into work intoxicated, and he and my supervisor had a “love/hate” relationship). In the past decade, I have settled for a more mundane job, but one that provides my family with stability nonetheless. My job does not (always) subject me to harsh attitudes or very much dysfunction, and I have great co-workers.

I’ve had very little training in thinking of myself as important as those around me. Even as I write this, I justify the reasons to take better care of myself so that I can be able to provide a better life for my family. Often, when I project my well-being to others, I’m deeply disappointed when I become depressed or sick.

Today, I will make an effort to ask for help when needed.

There’s nobody to ask- I will pray for strength and endurance.

I’m a weak person and often a weak follower, but I am a believer.

 

Why You Should Take a Break From Technology

woman walking near brown wooden door during daytime

“Technology is, of course, a double edged sword. Fire can cook our food but also burn us.” -Jason Silva

Mobile phones and other electronic devices offer access to an array of entertainment and information. We can access information about anything at any time. We can watch movies, listen to music, and read books with a sleight of hand. But these things are nothing more than distractions. In some regards, distractions can be helpful. When we need to move at a quick pace, listening to music on our iPhones provides that rush of adrenaline we need to hustle.

A diverse group of people who are distracted by cell phones and tasks.

Distractions Are Nothing New

For many years, people have turned to mindless entertainment. Such entertainment is usually wrought little redeeming qualities, but audiences tune in anyway. There’s the stereotypical image of the 1950s, where the man of the house retreats to his den to skim the local newspaper. Women turned to soap operas and television dramas to “escape” their ordinary lives.

In the 1980s, music videos and video games were rolled out to the masses. When people were not watching TV, playing games, or listening to the radio, they passed the time using the phone. Although technology has changed, the concepts are relatively the same. We seek distraction. We seek an escape from reality and our problems. By immersing ourselves in technology, we can feel “engaged” without fully participating in life.

Artificial Happiness

In my experience, I’ve learned that electronics and the various means of communications via electronics (i.e., my phone, laptop, blog, email, social media) provide me with an artificial “high”. Who isn’t delighted to get a new friend request or find some illuminating, esoteric information?

Promises of Opportunity

I was recently seduced by an email invite from a notable online community. I accepted the offer, which involved writing, and realized it amounted to pennies if it amounted to anything at all. Money for impressions, eyeballs, and clicks. The next day I vowed that I wouldn’t let the desire for success or money to cause me to accept such offers.

For others, they may be chasing other promises. The promise of fulfillment, success, friendship, beauty. Advertisers and publishers study our habits and know our desires. Before cell phones and computers, there were magazines, billboards, newspapers, and radio. Now, it is much easier for people to be swept away by advertising.

The Natural Tendency Towards Selfishness And Sin

One could say that greed, not a technology in general, was my flaw. Humans all have a tendency towards sin, whether it’s the promise of easy money (sloth, greed), or the envy of a celebrity, the feeling of adoration (pride), and even gluttony (casually, mindlessly eating while sitting in front of the TV.

Technology, in itself, isn’t inherently good or bad. It is a tool that we use. Unlike “functional” tools, such as an eating utensil, the “tool” of technology lends itself well to human weakness. We love to share our lives with others, yet technology can easily be misused. It also robs us of face-to-face interactions and “real” friends. Too much time online can make people feel lonely and depressed.

Teens Especially Vulnerable To Technology’s Vices

In an article from the Chicago Tribune, titled, “Mobile Phones Linked To Anxiety And Severe Depression In Teens” studies show that feelings of hopelessness and suicide increased by 12% between 2010-2015.

“As smart as phones may be these days, they simply don’t know when to quit. To protect your mental health, experts say you must develop ways of outsmarting them – and often that involves simply turning them off.” (https://yp.scmp.com/news/features/article/108242/mobile-phones-linked-anxiety-and-severe-depression-teens).

For teens, who on average spend 9 hours each day online (Common Sense Research), the use of electronics and technology is especially pervasive. When teens interact on social media, technology can cause harm when they feel excluded from social groups. Additionally, it’s easy to take offense to what others post on Instagram or any of the other myriad of social media.

The Addictive Nature of Technology

It’s important to consider the “feel good” effects of technology, and how we can become addicted to the “reward” our brain receives when we spend too much time online.

“Dopamine is a feel-good neurochemical messenger that carries signals across brain synapses, responsible for motivation and reward-seeking behavior, and essential to neuroplastic change.  Neuroplastic change is what allows a habit or addiction to form in the first place.” (thebestbrainpossible.com).

“All of our technology is completely unnecessary to a happy life.” -Tom Hodgkinson, (British writer)

The Minimalist Approach

In an article featured at Becoming Minimalist “7 Important Reasons To Unplug And Find Space” by Joshua Becker, we can discover some interesting reasons to avoid technology. The reason that resonated with me was  “Powering-down promotes creation over consumption.” Joshua points out that we spend our time in one of two ways: consuming or creating. We spend time reading, watching, playing or browsing. He advises us to power-down so that we can recharge our battery. In doing so, we can inspire the world around us, instead of simply taking in so many distractions.

Shut-Down Technology, Renew Your Soul

Why should anybody fast from electronics and technology? The same reason we should fast from anything in life. Moderation is key. Mindfulness and discipline to keep track of our precious energy and time, and so we don’t become so consumed by worldly pleasures and fleeting things.

Benefits To Your Well-Being

More time for face-to-face interactions.

More Time to create instead of consuming.

More time for personal reflection.

Less time spent clicking unnecessary pages.

Less time worrying about other people’s lives and dramas.

Less time comparing yourself to others.

 

 

3 Important People in Your Anxiety Treatment

“People tend to dwell more on negative things than on good things. So the mind then becomes obsessed with negative things, with judgments, guilt, and anxiety produced by thoughts about the future and so on.” -Eckhart Tolle

In the US, over 40 million people are affected by an anxiety disorder. Although it is highly-treatable, it’s reported that only about 37% of affected individuals receive treatment. (ADAA).

6 Types of Anxiety Disorders

  • Generalized Anxiety Disorder
  • Panic Disorder
  • Social Anxiety Disorder
  • Specific Phobias
  • Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
  • Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

When you consider the various sub-categories listed under “specific phobias”, one can conclude there is a multitude of anxiety types. These subtypes are broadly-defined:

3 Types of Phobias

    1. Agoraphobia– A fear, anxiety, or avoidance of non-specific situations where one may not be able to escape or get help if a panic attack occurs.
    2. Specific Phobia– A fear, anxiety, or avoidance of specific situations or object (i.e, a fear of flying, a fear of needles, or the fear of spiders qualify as specific phobias).
  • Social Anxiety Disorder– A fear, anxiety, or avoidance of social situations. Intense fear in social situations includes the fear of appearing foolish, which can physically by way of blushing, shaking, sweating, etc.

Scientists believe there are a complex variety of factors that cause anxiety disorders, but they can be simplified into two broad categories.

  1. Genetics– A family history of anxiety disorders is a significant indicator of being predisposed.
  2. Environment– Traumatic, stressful, or exposure to violence can cause individuals to develop anxiety disorders. (NAMI).

Identifying the sources of anxiety disorders can be complex and confusing, hence why it is especially important to first see your doctor to eliminate the possible physical cause that mimics anxiety disorders.

It is also important to do whatever you can to reduce or eliminate sources that cause you to feel more anxious or nervous. For instance, you can opt to drink decaffeinated coffee instead of regular coffee. Some dietary choices can improve the physical aspects of anxiety. Simple choices are only the beginning of managing anxiety disorders.

Anxiety Disorders Originate In The Recesses Of Our Brains

“According to the National Institute of Mental Health, there are two parts of the brain that are key players in the production and processing of anxiety – the amygdala and the hippocampus.” (Neurocore Brain Performance Centers).

Our brains- and our specific human experiences- are complex and vast, but the good news is that only you fully understand yourself! Conversely, others on your mental health “team” (i.e., your family doctor, your nutritionist, your spiritual advisor, therapists, counselors, and other qualified mental health professionals).

The Family Doctor

You may opt to schedule an appointment with your family doctor before or after you’ve had time to reflect and write down information on your anxiety disorder. You may have learned from school or work that you don’t like public speaking or crowds. It will be most beneficial of you to have notes and information to offer your doctor when attending your appointments.

Don’t be discouraged if your family doctor seems to focus on the “externals” more than the “internals”. The doctor may offer you unwanted advice, such as losing weight, getting more exercise, or reducing the amount of caffeine or alcohol you consume. These are important steps in the management of your anxiety, although, they are often not the only steps to pursue.

Therapists

As I mentioned earlier, each individual has their own unique and complex brain and set of experiences. There isn’t a “one size fits all” approach to anxiety. Medications may work for one person but may be ineffective for another. Many individuals prefer to manage their anxiety through therapy. Therapy types are as varied as the individuals seeking treatment, so be sure to have a solid good understanding of each type.

Traditional  Psychotherapy

  • Interpersonal therapy
  • CBT (Cognitive/Behavioral Therapy)
  • Psychodynamic Therapy

Non-Traditional Therapies

  • Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction model (Jon Kabat-Zinn)
  • EMDR- Eye Movement Desensitization Resolution (Often for individuals suffering from PTSD).
  • Interpersonal and Social Rhythm Therapy (IPSRT)- Developed to understand and improve moods, based on biological and social rhythms. (“Taking Charge”, University of Minnesota).

There are other therapies, which include group therapy, family therapy, and emotion-focused therapy. (Types of Therapy).

Help Yourself (And Others) Treat Your Anxiety Disorders

You may be limited in your choices of family doctors, based on where you live or the type of medical insurance you carry. Additionally, your medical insurance may limit the type of therapy or mental health services you can receive. Be sure to obtain a provider directory and handbook from your insurer to ensure you choose providers your insurance will cover, or you may end up paying more than you can afford for your treatment.

Consider what your own preferences are along with what your insurance will offer. Is your local family doctor in your network? If not, you may have to choose another or decide if it’s worth it to pay out-of-pocket.

In addition to receiving medical care and therapy, be sure to consider your own interests, and how they can be applied to help you manage and treat your anxiety.

“To know thyself is the beginning of wisdom.” -Socrates.

  • Are you artistic? Why not try painting when you need to calm down?
  • Are you a kinetic person? Do you have lots of energy? Why not try jogging to release some negative energy?
  • Are you an emotional or sensitive person? Why not channel your inner-poet and write something expressive?

When you know yourself, you have insight and wisdom about yourself, and thus, can make better decisions on how to treat yourself. You will not be able to treat anxiety effectively- at least, not in most circumstances, without the help of others. For some, that includes doctors and therapists. Many people wish to augment treatment by using their faith and spirituality. The most important thing to realize is that you can get the most out of managing anxiety if A) you understand yourself and B) you allow others to help.

References:

  1. https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-Conditions/Anxiety-Disorders
  2. https://www.mentalhelp.net/articles/specific-phobias-and-social-anxiety-disorder-social-phobia/
  3. https://www.neurocorecenters.com/blog/depression-anxiety-stresseffects-of-stress-anxiety-on-brain
  4. https://keltymentalhealth.ca/types-of-therapy
  5. https://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/what-types-psychotherapy-are-helpful-anxiety-and-depression
  6. https://www.2knowmyself.com/The_kinesthetic_personality_type
  7. https://sciencing.com/kinetic-energy-potential-energy-apply-everyday-life-15430.html
  8. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/changepower/201603/know-yourself-6-specific-ways-know-who-you-are

Simple Ways to Manage Anxiety and Depression

Simple Ways to Manage Anxiety and Depression

“Once a week, I like to slip into a deep existential depression where I lose all my sense of oneness and self-worth.” -Bo Burnham

The most helpful part of managing my mood disorder is the fact that my moods are fairly predictable. In more severe cases, it is much more difficult to manage, at least not without the help of doctors. I’ve battled these moods since I was a teenager.

I’m almost certain, however, that I experienced strange things when I was younger. These things I’m talking about are the symptoms one sees when they have experienced trauma. Dissociation, depersonalization, and even involuntary, but subtle, nervous ticks.

So, I’ve battled these moods for many years- anxiety, depression, GAD, OCD. I am familiar with the alphabet soup of mental illness- although, that doesn’t qualify me to dispense medical advice. It simply means, my conditions are much more manageable, so manageable now that I can tell the psychiatrist I don’t want to take the Lamictal or any other drug.

And, I’ve spent so many years on the prescription-drug rollercoaster, to no avail. Well, that’s not entirely true- Prozac wasn’t too bad, except for the occasional electrical surge. Lexapro wasn’t so bad, either. Definitely a pass on Paxil, Buspar, and Serzone.

You might be able to pick up on the fact that I haven’t written regularly for the past few weeks. Today I began to see an improvement in my mood. Soon I will be scribbling away, hopefully finishing some artwork. Now that I am feeling better, I wish to share some simple things that help me feel “at peace.”

Thrive Mindful- Ways To Feel “At Peace”

Shop when the stores are empty.

Get a haircut.

Study a free online course through Coursera.

Play board games with family.

Prank-call a family member.

Play a musical instrument.

Enjoy an open-air, free concert.

Organize photos.

Visit the library.

Ride a bike.

Adopt an animal from a shelter.

Call a long-lost family member.

Wash the car.

Donate unwanted clothes to charity.

Do some yard work.

Explore other WordPress blogs.

Read a good book.

Write a poem.

Organize computer files.

Go for a car ride at dusk.

Watch the sunrise.

Make a list of goals.

Write down 3 things you enjoyed when you were ages 9-12.

Do a free, online personality assessment.

Draw (or doodle) some pictures for your poetry.

Draw a self-portrait.

Rearrange living room furniture.

Invite the opinions of others on topics with universal appeal (i.e, favorites lists of anything)- Promotes diversity and fresh ideas!

Take the family or a friend out to lunch.

Watch a band at the coffee shop.

Schedule a yearly health exam.

Play tennis with some family or friends.

Mental Health Communities And Forums

Finding relevant information and maintaining privacy are key issues for individuals suffering from mental health issues such as anxiety or depression. I’ve included some resources that may be helpful for questions and answers.

www.uncommonforums.com: Topics include psychology, depression, anger management, addictions, eating disorders, and anxiety/panic attacks.

www.dailystrength.com: Online support groups for anxiety, addiction/recovery, mental health, men’s health, women’s health, teens, children’s health/parenting and many other health issues in general.

www.sane.org: An Australian mental health website that includes a well-organized forum area. The aesthetic appeal and non-spammy feel make the website worthwhile.

www.beatingthebeast.com: “Beating The Beast” touts itself as an online depression support community, but I’ve discovered useful advice on anxiety disorders, as well as bipolar and other mental health issues.

If you were to write a list of things that make you feel happy or relaxed, what would it include? Is there a pattern in your list?

My list includes a little socializing, some solitude, and purging of unused things that others might want to use. Note that much of my joy comes from reading, writing, and drawing.

No matter how depressed or anxious I become, I try to make an effort to pursue my faith (reading the Bible, watching or reading content online about my faith). One key difference between how I handle my moods now, as opposed to when I was younger, is the fact that I pursue my spirituality. Even when I feel I’ve lost hope or control, there is always something more that governs life and the world around me.

Understanding Anxiety’s Psychological Effects and Syncope

Speeding light corridor.

Every once in a while, something triggers my anxiety so intensely that I become physically and emotionally ill. Yesterday was one such day where I felt like I was going to faint. My skin was clammy, my stomach was churning- I initially thought the fruit I ate at lunch was causing the mild cramps in my stomach. I felt so weak and sick that I had to retreat to the bathroom and rest for a few minutes.

What set off the series of unpleasant symptoms was that I got cut on my finger at work. My co-worker was talking to me and I was feeling a little tired and distracted. This proved to be a recipe for disaster, at least, in my mind. As I was talking and working, the cutters slipped and sliced through the middle of my fingernail, drawing blood and stinging like crazy. I quickly wrapped the finger tightly and tried to continue working.

My co-worker suggested the cut may need stitches. When I told her I had cut through the nail and I didn’t think they could “stitch” my nail, she proceeds to offer vivid details about how the doctor might “rip my nail off”. She also mentioned they may apply “New Skin” to the nail, but since she already polluted my anxious mind with details of ripping my fingernail, I grew weak and dizzy. My skin got colder. I told her I had to go for a few minutes to look at the cut and sit down.

Eventually, I found a more helpful co-worker who provided me antibiotic cream. She told me the doctor might stitch under the nail, and apply the liquid bandage to the fragmented nail. I opted to wrap the finger as tight as possible and deal with a more thorough examination at the privacy of my home later that day.

I’ve had a few times in my life where anxiety- and the sight of blood or other bodily fluids, organs and things of that nature, have triggered the same symptoms.

The first time was when I was in elementary school. Our class had to walk down the corridor to look at the science fair entries. One project appeared to be a mason jar with the contents of an animal’s brain. The kids were enthralled by the “brain”. They kept talking about it, and suddenly, everything looked blue and surreal. The next thing I recall is waiting for my mom at the nurse’s station in the school office. The staff doted on me and seemed concerned.

In high school, my mind was occupied about various issues. At this time in my life (age 17), my grandmother had passed away. The funeral and surrounding events- the drinking binges my mom went on after my grandmother’s passing, may have contributed to my episode. It seems like I started getting more depressed as a teenager. I felt I was losing everybody and everything from my life. My friends were all struggling with problems too. Some of them spoke about their experiences with substances. To compound issues, the type of music I listened to at that time was very dark and depressing. This was undoubtedly a confusing and emotional time.

One day, I started to walk to school as usual. I hoped my friend was going to school that day because I could meet up with her and walk together. I remember that there were a Catholic church and school on my path. Every day, I’d pass and gaze at the statues. They seemed eery to me- they didn’t elicit the same emotions I’d feel when admiring art. In fact, they always gave me a morose feeling.

As I continued past the church, I focused my eyes on the Veteran’s Memorial. Suddenly, everything looked unreal and I felt faint. I kept walking and passed a morning jogger who mouthed, “Good morning!” as I dredged on. It dawned on me that I shouldn’t go to school, and I went home.

The final memory of fainting and dizzy spells comes from when I had an appointment at the doctor. I had blood drawn from that visit and I recall the details of blood work seemed vivid and overwhelming.

So what does anxiety have to do with these fainting episodes? I wanted to understand how something that originates in the mind can cause so many repercussions.

Fainting, otherwise known as syncope, is a “sudden loss of consciousness from a lack of blood flow to the brain.” (www.verywellhealth.com). There are a number of factors they can cause an individual to faint-

  • Dehydration
  • Heart Beat
  • Low Blood Pressure
  • Anxiety

Before fainting, these symptoms are present:

  • Dizziness
  • Nausea
  • Confusion
  • Blurred or Tunnel Vision
  • Sweating
  • Shaking
  • Shortness of Breath

Psychological Triggers

Although less common than other triggers, anxiety, stress, and panic disorder can all stimulate the vagus nerve- the nerve which stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system. “The parasympathetic nervous system regulates organ and gland functions during rest and is considered a slowly activated, dampening system.” (www.lumenlearning.com).

Hyperventilation and Hypoventilation

Too much or too little oxygen changes CO2 levels in the blood, which activates the feeling of passing out that often accompanies anxiety, stress, and panic disorder. (www.anxietycentre.com).

Our stress response prompts a release of stress hormones into the bloodstream that is supposed to equip humans to better manage threats and dangers. These hormones cause emotional, physiological, and psychological responses that signal us to respond- fight or flight.

Maybe, in the recesses of my mind, I perceive “blood” as a warning because I am not prepared for such accidents (i.e, I don’t usually carry bandages and first aid equipment). Who will take care of me if I can’t take care of myself? The vivid details of cuts and wounds really disturb my mind. Ultimately, I am reminded that this body of mine will eventually perish.

 

Regaining Control Over Anxiety at Work

Another anxiety attack manifested yesterday. The sudden bout of nervousness and agitation were precipitated by a few triggers.

  • My workspace was invaded and altered abruptly.
  • Physical discomfort and exhaustion from hormonal changes.
  • Working in an unorganized and moderately hazardous workspace.
  • Feeling overwhelmed with workload and expectations.
  • Embarrassment and feeling as though there was no “escape” from the chaos!

I would feel tears streaming down my face as I plotted what I could say to my supervisor to escape the madness I was struggling to contain. He was pushing me and my coworker to do more work, to work in between the seconds we waited for parts to assemble at my production job.

At first, I adapted my workspace to accommodate the changes implemented. After several minutes, I felt relaxed and I thought I was working at a moderate pace. My supervisor emerged and started piling partially-assembled bins on my table (which cluttered the space that I diligently maintained). I thought if I quit talking to my coworker working next to me I could work faster, but after working 7 days in a row, and battling PMDD (PMS on steroids), I realized despite my intentions and efforts, I couldn’t do the task today. I usually don’t assess myself so clearly and easily, but I’m well-acquainted with anxiety and all the masks she wears- the mask of OCD, agoraphobia, generalized anxiety, PTSD…even bulimia, and anorexia!

How I Gained Some Control

My choices were limited in the frantic environment in which I was thrust. The supervisor was hounding me to do more than I was capable of doing. PMS was wreaking so much havoc on my body that I had to sleep with a heating pad on my stomach for the past two days, and I used a pillow to elevate my sore feet at night. My mood seemed pleasant, mostly, until Sunday at work. I haven’t felt this agitated at work for a few months. At least, not so agitated that I wanted to leave for the day.

So I devised a way to tell my supervisor that I couldn’t handle working this day. After many interpretations of how I would elicit some shred of sympathy, I opted to find one of my supervisor’s subordinates. She nodded as I replayed the events in my work area and as I told her about my PMDD and anxiety symptoms. Within minutes she was able to get me moved to an area where I could work alone and in an orderly environment.

After I was situated in at my new station, I put in my earbuds and listened to some motivating music to get me thinking about how I would enjoy the day once I got out of work!

Here’s What Helped!

  • Change of environment.
  • Asking for help/support.
  • Being assertive.
  • Listening to music.
  • Deep breathing.
  • Working in a clutter-free area.
  • Working alone.
  • Finding a rhythm- working by the timer set on my new machine, as opposed to not having any timer/or relying on the timing and rhythms of my coworkers.

How to Balance the 7 Elements of Wellness

A woman with outstretched arms near a lake.

“Health is not everything, but without health, everything is nothing” (cited from Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher, 1788-1860).

Insulating Your Health With The 7 Dimensions of Wellness

While physical health is the most obvious part of wellness, there are several dimensions that are integrated to create healthy wellbeing. These seven elements of holistic wellness- physical health, spiritual health, and mental health- are indicated as:

  • Occupational- Finding work that maximizes your talents and abilities, honing your professional skills, determining your career goals, exploring opportunities for growth, taking vocational assessments.
  • Environmental- Spending time in nature and in pleasant environments, reducing or eliminating harmful noises and exposure to harmful pollutants.
  • Physical- Exercise, nutrition, sleep, weight management, protecting your body and being mindful of any changes or symptoms of illness. Hygiene and preventative measures are also important.
  • Emotional- Giving and receiving support, self-esteem, the ability to express emotions and share feelings, managing time and stress optimally.
  • Spiritual- Spending time alone, participating in religious or worship activities that satisfy your desire to understand your purpose in this world.
  • Social- Sharing your knowledge or skills with others, getting involved within your community or by volunteering, sharing your ideas and thoughts, (ala a suggestion box, for instance).
  • Intellectual- Keeping an active mind, reading, taking classes, being inspired by people or activities that challenge your thinking.

When Imbalance Occurs, We Are Less Resilient

At times, various aspects of our wellbeing dominate our lives, while other aspects may be neglected. When we become imbalanced in any one of the elements, our overall wellness is affected and we may be less resilient to handle additional stressors. It is important to accept that “life” sometimes happens and some events and exterior influences are beyond our control.

Adopting a few practical tips can help you overcome stress:

Adopting a few practical tips can help you overcome stress:

Avoid or limit exposure to triggering or stressful tasks or associations.

  • Be assertive.
  • Know your limits.
  • Maintain a flexible attitude and be willing to healthy compromises.
  • Keep things in perspective. Will it matter a month from now?
  • Practice forgiveness to release negativity.
  • Manage your time.
  • Ask for help.

Sources:

(https://www.grcc.edu/humanresources/wellness/sevendimensionsofwellness).
(https://www.emaze.com/@AIRQQRFI).